Moving to a new country and transitioning were certainly significant in the overall course of my life, but it's been really difficult to look back at the year and feel like I didn't have a single notable professional accomplishment.
Read MoreI got to a point where trying so hard to maintain some amount of "productivity" started to feel counter-productive. Seeing notably shorter to-do lists feels weird, but those lists were supposed to be a tool to enhance my life, not something to control or overwhelm it.
Read MoreI've discovered that giving myself room to be bad at some things frees up a lot of mental energy that I can use for the things I really do want to be good at. I spent so much time in my past worrying that if I let myself be bad at anything then I'd end up being bad at everything, but by not giving myself any space to just enjoy things I ended up burning out instead.
Read MoreI’ve used to-do lists and planners to try to bring some order to things, to help me remember what needs to be done, and to keep track of goals. I’ve been using habit tracking to help me maintain healthy routines. I’ve had to reassess what is really important to me, and figure out how that changes over time, and sometimes I’ve quit things, giving present-me some room to breathe and to better support future-me.
Read MoreI hope that talking about my own failures will help make it easier for other people to talk about theirs, to realize that we don't have to be perfect all the time in this industry, or in this world. Trying and failing is still failing, but it's also still trying, and being able to keep trying, even if all you're succeeding at right now is getting out of bed most days, is how we're able to keep fighting to make things better.
Read MoreI think it would benefit all of us to think about why we define ourselves the way we do. During the years I felt like I didn't belong in this industry, where I didn't know anyone in tech in my demographic, a company identity felt safer than an individual one. I didn't feel like I belonged in tech, but surely these tech companies did, so I hid behind their identities as a way of coping with my impostor syndrome.
Read MoreI'm going to keep talking about burnout, because we as an industry talk too little about the effects this work has on us. Now more than ever, one of the best things we can do is reach out to and support each other, to listen to each other and help each other.
Read MoreSometimes we want to quit things, but quitting things can be hard. Often times, the reasons we shy away from quitting something come down to fear, and it can be very helpful to figure out where that fear is coming from. As difficult as it can be, quitting things is a great way of helping to keep your life balanced, fulfilling, and healthy.
Read MoreAfter years of negative environments, in an effort to avoid getting stuck in a toxic and unhealthy atmosphere again, brains can get so far into constant vigilance mode that they go too far and end up struggling to trust anything, which can be unhealthy and isolating itself. Regaining trust after it's been broken is hard, whether that's trust in another person, the tech industry, or yourself. It takes time, but as a helpful twitter bot has also reminded me, it is possible.
Read More