I want to make sure that I spend my energy much more carefully going forward, and this means making a deliberate effort to free myself from things that use up fucks without giving me anything in return. I want 2018 to be the year that I set myself free from other people's expectations of what I should be.
Read MoreSo, what have we learned about changing names and email addresses?It is mostly totally doable if you have a week's worth of time, a greater than infinite amount of patience, and preferably an ISP with decent upload speeds.
Read MoreBeing nonbinary feels right, as opposed to just feeling less wrong. I would like to hope that the more of us are able to share our stories, the easier things might be for other nonbinary people in the future as they travel their own gender exploration journeys.
Read MoreI’ve used to-do lists and planners to try to bring some order to things, to help me remember what needs to be done, and to keep track of goals. I’ve been using habit tracking to help me maintain healthy routines. I’ve had to reassess what is really important to me, and figure out how that changes over time, and sometimes I’ve quit things, giving present-me some room to breathe and to better support future-me.
Read MoreI hope that talking about my own failures will help make it easier for other people to talk about theirs, to realize that we don't have to be perfect all the time in this industry, or in this world. Trying and failing is still failing, but it's also still trying, and being able to keep trying, even if all you're succeeding at right now is getting out of bed most days, is how we're able to keep fighting to make things better.
Read MoreWe need to start referring to these types of skills as "core" skills rather than "soft" skills, because they are the core of successful, mature engineering. We need to stop viewing them as nice to have and start seeing them as mandatory, and we need to stop hiring and promoting people who don't have them. Tolerating antisocial, biased, or abusive behavior from people just because they can write good code does this industry and everyone in it a disservice.
Read MoreI think it would benefit all of us to think about why we define ourselves the way we do. During the years I felt like I didn't belong in this industry, where I didn't know anyone in tech in my demographic, a company identity felt safer than an individual one. I didn't feel like I belonged in tech, but surely these tech companies did, so I hid behind their identities as a way of coping with my impostor syndrome.
Read MoreIt can be a challenge if you're starting with or coming from a "blame and train" or "blame and shame" culture to a "blameless" or "blame-aware" one, but the focus on desired outcome and how people can work together to help resolve a situation in the moment as well as make the systems involved better equipped to handle situations in the future, can do wonders for system and organizational resilience.
Read MoreI'm going to keep talking about burnout, because we as an industry talk too little about the effects this work has on us. Now more than ever, one of the best things we can do is reach out to and support each other, to listen to each other and help each other.
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